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Chris & Rebecca
We are sure you must be experiencing many mixed emotions - please know you are extremely brave and we have all the respect in the world for you, regardless of what you choose (we mean that). We were honored and overjoyed to become parents through adoption in 2017, and now we're starting the adventure again. When we adopted our son we learned the importance of openness, honesty, and a sense of humor in this process, and we will bring this to a connection with you.
Adoption in Our Lives
Adoption led us to our son Gregory, who lights up any room he enters. We were lucky to build a relationship with Gregory's birthparents, and consider ourselves privileged to know them.
We look forward to developing a similar relationship with you, based on mutual respect and a love of the child you're entrusting us with. It is extremely important to us, and to our children's identities, that we are able to discuss their birthparents with genuine, utmost respect.
Being a reading teacher, Rebecca wrote Gregory a book about the day he was born. It includes pictures of him as a newborn, pictures with us, and pictures of the five of us together - birthparents, adoptive parents, and little baby Gregory. We read this book often. It is our hope and prayer that this book will be his conversation starter when he needs it to be, or just a comforting ritual which can remind him of all the people who love him. We have seen that reading it together again and again provides reassurance to him. Right now, he loves pointing out the picture of his birthparents and saying their names. He associates his adoption with a sense of positivity, which was our goal.
Our Leisure Time
In the last few years Rebecca took up cooking as a hobby, got hooked, and now cooks the majority of our food from scratch. We eat a home-cooked breakfast and dinner together every day as a family. We saw a bumper sticker once that said, "Help heal the world: cook dinner tonight." We really believe this to be true. There is something restorative about gathering fresh, local ingredients, and sitting down together over a meal (often with fresh picked flowers on the table). We do not have a state of the art kitchen, but everyone chips in. Nothing beats laughing together as a family over a good meal.
We love to be outside, and as New Englanders we take advantage of all four seasons. Our home has very little screen time, believing that childhood is best spent being imaginative and adventurous. There are several nature playgroups in the area which we participate in. It has been a joy to watch Gregory experience an old-fashioned childhood: climbing trees, hunting for bugs, sledding, and splashing in mud puddles. We also have farms nearby that let kids do chores like collect chicken eggs.
As you can see we are happiest outdoors, but we are also only about half an hour from Boston, and all of its cultural opportunities. Rebecca loves the Boston Ballet, Chris loves the Boston Symphony Orchestra, Gregory loves the Aquarium, and we all love the Red Sox!
Qualities We Admire in Each Other
Rebecca About Chris: Chris is a true family man. He is the person you call when you can't do it on your own anymore. I have seen him drive around at four o'clock in the morning looking for an open pharmacy when I've been sick and needed medicine. He is humble and unassuming. Most people have no idea he has a Ph.D. in engineering, because he is equally comfortable talking about baseball, or college football. He is a great dad and husband.
Chris About Rebecca: Rebecca is a great friend. She has had many of the same friends for 20 or even 25 years. There are multiple people in the world whose first phone call is to Rebecca when they need to talk. I have seen her run into students she had 10+ years ago in the grocery store, and they not only remember her right away, they're overcome with happiness to see her. I have seen 18 year old guys on the verge of tears, they're so thrilled to see her.
Our House and Neighborhood
We live in a small town in Massachusetts, whose schools are consistently ranked the best in the country. This area of town has lots of trees, sidewalks, and parks. We're within walking distance of the library, downtown area, and swimming pond. We're also only a couple of blocks from the elementary school. Our neighborhood has a mix of retirees, who are always inviting us to come have a glass of lemonade, and young families. It's a very close-knit community, the type of place where you know your mailman's name and get him a Christmas present.
Our home was built in the 1930s, and has all the charm of an old house. It is not huge, but it definitely has character. Our sun room acts as a playroom. We hang out there, playing on the floor while waiting for thunderstorms to pass by in the summer, and we watch the snow pile up while reading books in the winter. We also have a good sized, fenced in backyard. Our backyard has a huge tree, which provides so much shade that even when it's 90 degrees outside we can comfortably hang out back there.
Our Extended Families
We are fortunate to have a set of grandparents, and all Gregory's aunts and uncles, within a 20 to 30 minute drive. Chris is a twin, and his brother's son Theo is only five months older than Gregory. It has been a lot of fun to raise kids so close in age, especially since they only live a couple of towns over. Often Gregory and Theo act more like brothers than cousins, roughhousing one minute, and playing nicely the next! Chris's parents live about four hours away in New Jersey, on the same lake he grew up on. We both like road trips, so a drive of that distance doesn't bother us.
When you picture Rebecca's family, picture a large Irish family with parties you can hear from all the way down the road. Her parents are each one of six kids, so there are (literally) dozens of cousins, ranging in age from one to sixteen. They act like older siblings to Gregory, including him in their backyard baseball games, and teaching him the fine art of making a s'more.
Both sides fell head over heels in love with Gregory. When one of Rebecca's cousins told his five year old son that we brought Gregory home, he immediately started getting in the car - he wanted to visit that instant! Everyone is equally as excited, if not more so, to welcome another baby.
From Us to You
Being chosen by Gregory's birthparents has been the greatest honor of our lives, and a responsibility we do not take lightly. It is vitally important to us that Gregory knows his story, and also knows that no question is taboo to ask us. Likewise, it is equally important to us that we keep Gregory's birthparents updated, and joyfully fulfill our contact commitments. It is something we truly enjoy doing. We promise to send regular updates with letters and captioned pictures, and would be honored to have more contact - including visits - if you are amenable to that.
The right match is critically important, and so we have tried to be candid and honest in our profile. While we would love to become parents again soon, the important thing is that you make the decision you feel is right, and we hope you feel supported and empowered to do so. We honestly believe the right match comes together when it's meant to be.
It is very important to us that our children grow up with at least one sibling, as we both did. Gregory is going to be a great older brother. He is already a class clown, he's a fearless leader, and he loves babies (really, his first word was "baby"!).
We've been married for seven years, together for ten, and parents for four. We're lovers of family, summer, and a good book (in that order). We believe that the happiest people in life aren't those who have the most, but those who need the least. We think of summers at the lake with family: playing board games, hanging out around the campfire, and listening to the Red Sox on the radio. Those simple things are what life is all about, much more so than the latest toy or fanciest vacation.
We would rather our child learn good sportsmanship than be the star pitcher of the baseball team, and we would rather our child learn the value of hard work and personal responsibility than get straight As. Our children don't "need" to be anything, other than the unique individuals that they are. It is our job to love them unconditionally, and teach them the values that matter the most.
Rebecca once got a fortune cookie which read, "Your ability to find the silly in the serious will take you far" - one of the few accurate fortunes we've ever received! We cultivate the magic and wonderment of childhood, while also practicing discipline. Children feel safe and thrive in a home with structure and routine, but we also consider ourselves fun parents. We make believe together, pile into the car for a last-minute road trip somewhere fun, have lots of inside jokes, and outdo each other seeing who can sled down a hill the fastest. We model and enforce good behavior, but we also know how to get our hands dirty and have fun.
Chris has a Ph.D. in engineering, and Rebecca is a teacher (she teaches sixth grade English, and also taught fourth grade for several years), so as you can probably guess, education is very important to us. So much so that Rebecca attends almost all of the school board meetings in town (and is seriously considering running for school board one day!). Massachusetts is known for its good schools, and our local schools are no exception. Having said that, we also know that each child has individualized needs, and there are many good quality private schools in the area which we would explore if the public schools weren't a good fit for whatever reason.
We hope to have given you a good picture of our family, so that you can make the decision that is right for you.
With appreciation and good wishes,
Chris & Rebecca